“The thing I hate about Mother’s Day is that it just feels so fundamentally untrue,” said one of the mothers in this month’s Meaning of Motherhood Discussion Circle. Mother’s Day flattens motherhood, she continued, claiming that we’re “superheroes” and the best way to honor us is with a bouquet and brunch.
Modern Mother’s Day, with its saccharine greeting cards, ignores the way in which we, as a a society, have isolated, abandoned, and devalued mothers while also depending on them to meet everyone’s needs.
But this is not always how Mother’s Day was.
In its early iteration, it was not Mother’s Day (singular), but Mothers’ Day (plural): a day of collection action organized by activist Ann Reeves Jarvis in 1858 to help combat infant mortality and unsanitary living conditions in Appalachia.
Through her “Mothers’ Day Work Clubs” Jarvis aimed to provide medical care, education, and other assistance for struggling mothers. Ya know, actual material things that would meaningfully improve mothers’ lives.
Jarvis’s daughter, who successfully lobbied to Congress for a national Mother’s Day holiday to honor the work and spirit of her mother, later denounced how it had been commercialized by the flower/chocolate/jewelry industries, and she spent the latter part of her life trying to remove it from the calendar.
So, if you hate Mother’s Day with its candy and cards, don’t worry. So did its founder.
What if we, the haters of this holiday, decided that Mother’s Day (singular) should once again become Mothers’ Day (plural)? What if we—mothers and non-mothers alike—spent the day participating in collective conversations, community organizing, political action, and efforts to provide mothers with access to safe and reliable healthcare, housing, food, childcare, education, employment, legal resources, protection, and power.
What if we recognized the truth that mothers are not superheroes, but people, who are birthing and raising more people, and that all those people need and deserve more than just bouquets and brunch.
Explore what Mothers’ Day could feel like in The Meaning of Motherhood Course, a self-paced course that explores and honors the full experience of motherhood. We have a LIVE online Discussion Circle every month.
From now until the end of May, 2023 join the Meaning of Motherhood for
$249 $199
Register here. Use offer code: MOMSDAY23
What would you do on this newly imagined Mothers’ Day? Share your answer in Mother Den.
Danielle LaSusa Ph.D. is a Philosophical Coach, helping new moms grapple with what it means to make a person. She is the creator of The Meaning of Motherhood course, and co-creator and co-host of Think Hard podcast, which brings fun, accessible, philosophical thinking to the real world. To join her mailing list, subscribe here.
© Copyright Danielle LaSusa PhD, LCC, 2021. All rights reserved.
